Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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