just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
