Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
