i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize