kristin has been a bad kristin
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
only if we run a train.
done.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
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