nut hugger
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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