so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
