why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I have aggressive nipples.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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