Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
