seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
