There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize