you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
