it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize