kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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