So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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