After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
