I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
