you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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