My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
There's always time for handjobs
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
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