Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
My day in three words: secret purse cake
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize