My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
