People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
