Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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