yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
