Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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