Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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