he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I didn't notice because vodka
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
