Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
