The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
