Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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