I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
