he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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