Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
the liver wants what the liver wants
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
