hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
