dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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