I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
