PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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