To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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