Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
