I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
