like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
