Grow some girl-balls and come out already
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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