We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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