Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
