Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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