what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
