he wants to bone in the snuggie
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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