Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
So many bounce houses so little time
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
