You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize