that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
