i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
i out mim tonsoeep
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