Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
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