someone get that fucking seahorse.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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